Akira (Remake) - Script Review

Another Remake: Akira

The Verdict:

Condensing and remaking the story only leaves us with a highly visual movie, without an engaging plot or interesting characters to care for.

What's it about?

A young biker gang member gains uncontrollable psychic power and has to be stopped by his friends and the army.

Plot Summary:

Teaser: An explosions shatters Manhatten, in the crater stands a boy. Colonol Shackleton orders to put Subject 28 and the others into cryo-stasis. 

A text informs us, that Manhattan was sold to Japan, as the US hits a deep recession, following the total destruction of New York.

Meet Travis, orphaned, 11, on his first day of school: He gets bullied and befriends Kaneda, 14, who protects him.

10 years later, New Tokyo has risen on Manhatten. We meet the two again at a Bar, they established a biker gang (the Red devils); After a reckless Stunt, injuring his girlfriend Kaori, Travis goes to a 'mobile rehab van' by Vanguard, as he fears he will do drugs again. He has to wear an electronic band, but is promised to stay clean.

Soon after, Travis, while attacking a rival gang member, runs into Thomas, a little boy looking like an old man and is badly hurt. This strange child is escorted by Kay, who is arrested together with Kaneda, while Thomas is brought into a care facility by Shackleton. Kay and Kaneda are released, while Travis is in a hospital, completely healed already. He escapes, before Shackleton, who is informed that Travis' blood contains the mysterious Compound-A, arrives to get him. But later he gets him, when Travis is hidden away by Kaneda and Kay. So the group breaks into the facility to rescue Travis, who slowly discovers his unimaginable powers rips apart the whole facility. Only three other test subjects can stop him, but not kill him. Finally Shackleton finds out, that the 'mobile rehab' project injected Travis with the Compound, in order to restore America to it's old glory, but decides not to do anything about and continues hunting down Travis. 

Travis reaches the Crater, trying to free Akira, aka Subject 28, who was responsible for the first explosion. Kaneda, Kay and Shackleton try everything in their power to stop him, attacking him with tanks, lasers, solar beams, but only hurt Travis. But when he sees his girlfriend getting killed by bullet, meant for him, Travis goes totally insane and explodes. Shackleton, Kaneda and Kay can escape on board a helicopter in the last second and see New Tokyo falling to ashes. 

Final Image: Akira awakens, steps out of his Cyro-Chamber and Travis bows down before him...

Observations:

First off, of all the script I ever read, this was the most exhausting one. Walls of text littered over the pages, describing the action in so many details, it was like reading a novel. 

The visual detail and  ideas were astonishing. Whitta develops an interesting American-Japanese Hybrid-Culture, painting the co-existence of extreme poverty and wealth in grand pictures.

I don't like it, when the story is just happening to the characters, without them ever taking charge or making their own decisions. Unfortunately, it was like this in this script: Travis gets injected with Compound-A, gains uncontrollable power and runs amok. He isn't the active protagonist once throughout the whole script. I feel cheated and - to be honest - bored, when this happens.

The emotional angle was heavily underplayed, in my opinion. The friendship between Travis and Kaneda should come to a fulminant finale, but it fell flat. The script spends too much time with military personnel and the mythology, but forgot the characters at the heart of the story.

Differences to the 1988 Movie:

Names: Tetsuo = Travis; Takashi = Thomas; Kei = Kay; Shikishima = Shackleton; and so on...

The script adds a little bit of background to Akira's first explosion, explaining why New Tokyo is build on americal soil, but adds nothing significant new or exciting to the story.

The most radical change concerns the ending: Planned as the first part of a larger series (possibly a trilogy...) the movie ends shortly after Akira awakens and leaves most plot points hanging.

The Project:

The script is based on the Manga by Katsuhiro Otomo from the year 1982. A hugely popular anime version of that movie was released in 1988. Shortly after that Warner Brothers bought the live-action rights, but nothing happened for the next 20 years. In 2008, Leonardo DiCaprio was set to produce a live-action adaptation with this script. In February 2010 the Hughes Brothers (From Hell) took over the Director's chair, but left it again in May 2011.
The following month Jaume Collet-Serra (of 'Unknown') was announced as the new director, with the hopes to realize this movie with the modest budget of 90 million dollars. (Source: FilmJunk)

The biggest concern of the studio is to find a suitable actor: many stars were offered the role, namely Joseph Gordon-Levitt, James Franco, Zac Efron, Andrew Garfield, James McAvoy or Michael Fassbender, but nobody has signed up so far. Apparently the strongest contender for the role of Kaneda is Garrett Hedlund, the lead of Tron:Legacy. (Source: Movie|Line)

Gary Oldman is in talks to play Colonel Shackleton, while Helena Bonham-Carter is wanted to play Lady Miyako, another test subject and only a small role. (Source: TwitchFilm)

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20,000 Leagues Under the Sea (Remake) - Script Review

Post based on the remake script '20,000 Leagues Under the Sea' by Craig Titley, July 2007, second draft. This is not the final film version!

The Verdict:

The script is a very entertaining, action-packed throw-back to the good ol’ adventure movies, with lacking characterization of the main protagonists and an unclear enemy force.

What's it about?

Ned Land is taken aboard the Nautilus and helps Captain Nemo retrieve the keys to an ancient civilization, which holds priceless treasures and the most dangerous weapon of the world.

Plot Summary [SPOILERS]:

India, 1857: Prince Dakkar tells his son about the wonderful mysteries of life, while his beautiful wife watches over them. Later that night the British general Anson will kill all three of them in cold blood.

10 years later: Rumors of a giant monster frightens the west. Under the lead of Commander Farragut an expedition is send out by the Royal Navy to kill the beast. The Commander forces Ned Land, the world-best harpooner, to join his forces or rot in prison for the rest of his life. Julie Fleischer, the only woman with more than one line in this script – and of course the love interest – smuggles herself aboard the ship, in the trunks of the marine life expert Professor Annorex, because her father was killed in the last attack by this monster. The ship sails to the last attack site of the beast and is promptly attacked by it. It turns out to be a huge iron submersible called Nautilus. The only survivors, Ned, Julie and the Professor, are taken aboard by Captain Nemo and stay there for weeks.

Nemo stole a map from Julie’s father, who was an archeologist, and tries to find a treasure in a Sumerian temple. While Nemo retrieves 6 ancient keys, Ned and Julie try to flee, but are attacked by Ottomans and have to return to the Nautilus.

Captain Nemo takes the ship back to it’s base, an old volcanic island in the middle of the ocean. Nemo reveals that he funded the work of Julie’s father all these years and was a good friend of him. Now he tries to finish his work of finding an ancient, highly-developed culture, but he has to find a missing 7^th key. Coincidentally, Julie has the map of this key memorized and can lead Nemo there. But not before Ned and Julie make out for a bit…

The last key is hidden in the Antarctic ice and soon after Nemo, Ned, Julie and the Professor arrive there, they are attacked by General Anson, who wants the power of this ancient civilization to himself. The wounded Professor is left behind and now helps General Anson to stop Nemo. But he already has found the last key and takes course for the Lost World. Deep in the ruins of this civilization Nemo finds the Eye of Shiva, when bringing it back to the Nautilus, they are attacked by Giant Squid.

Now Captain Nemo reveals his true plan, he wants to use the power of the Eye to kill every human being as revenge for his killed family. He abandons Ned on the open sea and returns to his base. Ned follows them, while the Nautilus is overpowered by General Anson, who discovered and conquered Captain Nemo’s hide-out. To make matters worse, a new expedition under the command of Farragut also discovered the islands and starts bombarding it. While Ned fights and frees Julie, the Professor and Nemo, General Anson activates the Eye. It’s power summons a huge, roaring storm over the small island. General Anson tries to escape on an airship, but is killed by Captain Nemo. Farragut’s attack damaged the Nautilus, so Ned has to go out in a diving suit and de-activate the Eye of Shiva. He succeeds, but the Nautilus – with Captain Nemo aboard – falls down a deep chasm. The End.

Observations:

Unclear enemy force: I feel, there a few too many antagonistic forces at play in this script. On the first page General Anson is introduced as the main evil force. But in the middle of the script, his ottoman henchman does all the work and General Anson is only in the background. After a while Farragut comes into the play, another British Navy officer, whose only job seems to be to be a disruptive factor for everyone else. I wonder why the script writer put him in? In the last part Nemo also develops evil traits, threatening to destroy the world, which makes sense, regarding his personal history. As motivation for the character it is interesting and a nice twist at the end, but the threat is never addressed after the attack by Anson and just vanishes. This feels shallow and lacking.

Lacking Characterization: Who is the main protagonist? It clearly should be Ned Land. He gets dragged aboard in his Call to Adventure, he has the love story. But he only follows Captain Nemo. Ned develops no agenda of his own and no motivation to do anything in this script. Captain Nemo on the other hand gets a tragic back-story, has a clearly defined goal to pursue, but along the way also seems to be evil. So, the script is split between two characters: Ned, the flat archetype of a movie hero and Captain Nemo, the tragic, but ultimately corrupted prince, pushing the story forward.

The Project:

The script is based on the classic science-fiction by Jules Vernes, published in 1870. There were a few movie adaptations starting in 1907 with a silent short film. The most famous adaptation, produced by Walt Disney, came out in 1954, but there are dozens of other movie and TV versions of this tale.

Titley (Percy Jackson and the Olympians) wrote this version of the script for Sam Raimi to produce, but nothing came of it. After McG had a go at it, David Fincher (Se7en, The Social Network) is now directing this Remake/Adaptation, to be released in 2013.

I am looking forward to your comments! Just choose 'Anonymous' and you don't to register just to write a comment. 


Thanks for reading,
- Tristan

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'Oldboy' Remake - Script Review

Based on the 'Oldboy' - Remake script by Ernesto M. Foronda & Fabian Marquez from April 21, 2005.

Summary: The script has nothing new to say and doesn't add anything to the original movie. Apparently there is no cultural gap to close in bringing this story into the american theaters, so why bother in writing and making a new film? It is justified that this project is dead!

What's it about?

Gus, a father and husband never home, gets kidnapped and caged for twenty years without anyone telling him why. When he is released Gus is out for revenge and finding out, why he was imprisoned.

The Original:
Released in 2003, the revenge thriller OldBoy is directed by Chan-wook Park and quickly hailed as one of the best movies of the year. The film goes on to win the Grand Prize of the Jury in Cannes

Only cosmetic changes:

- We see Gus by the angel wings;

- He wakes up on a church; other locations altered;

- The suicidal man at the beginning, doesn't kill himself;

- Fried dumplings are changed to Taquitos;

- The female lead is not a kitchen chef, but a delivery girl...

The list goes on like this, but there are no major differences. The script follows the original movie beat for beat. Don''t get me wrong: This is a good script, but nobody needs it. It adopts all motifs throughtout the movie like the heavy use of Voice Over or the ants as a symbol for Gus' Isolation, which leads to:

The twist and resolution at the end are the same:

I thought they would tone down the ending, as it is rather shocking and explicit, but the script follows the original movie even there. Also the fights leading up to the finale weren't toned down at all. The ending was also the big chance for the scriptwriters to come up with something new, but they decided to adapt one to one.

Blake Snyder's Save the Cat! - Movie Category: Whydunit
This category is defined by an investigation into the dark side of humanity and a shocking revelation. 
(I started reading "the last book on screenwriting that you'll ever need" and in future posts I want to find out, if the categories Blake Synder proposes in his book Save the Cat! are a useful method for analysing scripts or not. Perhaps they are helpful for you, my readers, too.)

As always: the comment section below works without registration, just choose "Comment as Anonymous" - I am looking forward to your discussion.
And if you like my blog be sure to become my follower - Thanks!

- Tristan

References: IMDb Oldboy (2003); IMDb Oldboy (2012); Article about the death of the project; Wiki;

'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - The Quest Structure

by Tristan Mahlow

Greetings,
today with my last article about 'Clash of the Titans' (2010). This time another observation, I'd like to share with you.
After watching the movie I had the feeling, Perseus is not in control of the action, but rather that - like in a Roleplaying game - he stumbled from task to task.
Right now I can hear you say: 'But that's what a Hero's Journey is all about: a hero overcoming increasingly obstacles towards reaching his goal' - and you are absolutely right! But what I learned fro watching this movie: Do not make it this damn obvious! I could feel the gears of the plot grind in the background - it was like checkmarking all the steps of a Hero's Journey. This is also due to the passive nature of Perseus, who doesn't make a single decision in this movie (soon there is a post coming about that problem). All in all this made the movie feel so unnatural.

Note to myself: The development of my plots should be organic, resulting out ot the needs of my characters. (Even when following the rule book!)

 Have a nice day,
- Tristan


Other parts in this Series:
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 1
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 2
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 3
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Non-Achievement

References: IMDb (5,9/10); Wiki; Roger Ebert; Rotten Tomatoes (28%);

'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Non-Achievement

by Tristan Mahlow 


 Every now and then I come out of the cinema with the feeling the world around me has changed. Furthermore, that I have changed. That I am stronger, greater than before. Colours are brighter, there seems to be an epic score in everything I do. It is a faint feeling, fickle and gone the second I immerse myself back into real world. But isn't this feeling the reason we want so see the big movies? They promise to be bigger than life and to let us experience things we otherwise had no chance to experience.

So when I walk out of a big Hollywood-Blockbuster and do not have this feeling something must be wrong. It feels unsatisfying, empty and to be honest: two hours seemed wasted. As you might have guessed, I felt this way after watching 'Clash of the Titans' (2010).

I like to call it the feeling of Non-Achievement. We watch our hero fighting and questing for two hours, after which the enemy, Hades, is just cast down the sea, to live for eternity in the Underworld. They stopped his attempt to destroy Joppa, but finally nothing has changed. For two hours they fought so that everything can stay the same?! 

Ends tend to be designed more open in the last few years as the danger of a sequel is always lurking around the corner, but in this case it is also the fault of a bad set-up. Hades is a rather weak and bland villain - his threat never really feels real. So in the end, his defeat doesn't come as a relieve, as the conclusion we waited and hoped for.

Take-away message: Do not dissapoint the viewer: Make your end satisfaying! The Hero should defeat Evil and get the girl (there are exceptions of course).

Have a great day,

- Tristan


Other parts in this Series:
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 1
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 2
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 3
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Non-Achievment

References: IMDb; Wiki; Roger Ebert; Rotten Tomatoes (28%);

'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 3

by Tristan Mahlow

The last screenplay of 'Clash of the Titans' I will be looking at, is from the year 2008. One year after Travis Beachem's script, Lawrence Kasdan crafted a revised version incorporating the two previous screenplays.

1. Script Summary
2. Script Differences & Similarities
3. Anaylsis
4. Conclusion
5. Questions

1. Script Summary

Zeus slips into the bedchamber of Queen Danae and seduces her in the form of her husband. But when her real husband, King Acrisius, finds out about this betrayal, he curses Zeus and casts his wife and her unborn child out onto the sea, as a acrifice for Tiamat, Godess of the Deep. For this act Acrisius gets punished by the Heavens: he is turned into the monster Kalibos.

On Mount Olympos we come to know, that the Gods want to offer the humans a peace treaty. Only Tiamat and Set are against the treaty and plot to take over Zeus' throne.

The Messenger of the Gods arrives at Joppa, informing King Kepheus of the treaty. The only condition: A marriage between his daughter, Andromeda, and a demi-god we all know, Perseus. 

The next scenes introduce us to Perseus and show us his family, until the unaware Perseus is abducted by The Wilting Girl. On the way to Joppa The Wilting Girl reveals to Perseus his divine lineage. The next scene intoduces us to Princess Andromeda, again going at it with a kitchen servant (is this really the best character defining moment they could think of?). Arriving at Joppa, Perseus and Andromeda meet and decide not to marry, nonetheless they sleep together. 
On the next day the festivities start and the drunk Queen Cassiopeia insults in her toast the Godess Tiamat, provoking her anger. Tiamat appears and issues her ultimatum: If the people of Joppa do not sacrifice Andromeda, Tiamat's Leviathan will destroy the city in thirty days. 
A plan to save the city is formed: Perseus, his adoptive father, Spyros, The Wilting Girl, Amoun and the hunters Mongke and Tamburlane, as well as some prateorian guards take off in the morning to seek the councel of the Norn Sisters. On the way, Perseus falls in love with The Wilting Girl, while giving her a new Name, Vidalia. Back at Joppa, a disciple of Tiamat sets his plan into motion to abduct Andromeda. On their way to the Norn Sisters, the group has to fight a Humbaba, the Lotophagi and Kalibos. Joining them in their last fight: the Djinn Raiders.
Finally they arrive at the Norn Sisters. As we all know, the Sisters tell Perseus that only the stare of the Medusa can kill the Leviathan. Charon's ferry takes them over the Tartaros, arriving at Medusa's Palace. While outside of the Palace most of the group gets killed by Centaurs, Perseus gets the Head of the Medusa. Now the group has to get back to Joppan in the four remaining days. Perseus and Vidalia share the night together. The next morning both are criticised by Amoun, when suddenly Set appears. He kills Amoun, then tries to kill Vidalia, but summoning godly powers Perseus can stop Set. When the few remaining survivors reach Joppa, they are stunned by the vast inhuman army besieging the city. Inside the royal Palace Princess Andromeda gets abducted, as the people of Joppa want to sacrifice her. 
It's about time for the Showdown:
The two armies, Tiamat's and Joppa's, start their relentless battle against each other, while on the other side of the city the Kraken emerges, demanding the sacrifice of Princess Andromeda. Perseus summons a Pegasus and flies over the battle field to save Andromeda, who fell down into the ocean, now exposed to the Leviathan. Perseus can defeat the Leviathan with the help of Medusas' head, Tiamat disappears and Joppa's army can overrun the rest of Tiamat's horde. 
In the aftermath Princess Andromeda offers Perseus the King's throne, but he refuses. The last scene has Perseus speak to Zeus. The young demi-god accepts his heritage and thanks his real father, before going to search for his love, Vidalia.

2. Script Changes
The differences to the last script are only minor. One minor character dissapears, but Calabus makes a return as Kalibos. But now he is not the son of Hera anymore, but the deformed King Acrisius. Accept for these changes the whole structure and all characterizations stay the same.

3. Analysis
The revised  script makes only superficial improvements. The problems of story, motivation and character writing is untoched. But in addition to the problems mentioned in my earlier post, i would like to adress some other things, that really bothered me:
- Reasonable Doubt: How can you doubt the gods, when they are ever present? In this script all kinds of gods, from the highest to the lowest ranks, are running around on earth, very present, but still, every, and I mean every line of dialogue spoken by Perseus revolves around one topic only: Are there Gods? Can I really be a demi-god?
- Avoidance of Dilemma: The script goes out of his way to avoid any kind of dilemma from the start: Instead of making us care for Andromeda by letting Perseus (and the viewer) fall in love with her, letting us care for her, would make seem her sacrifice meaningful. But no! Perseus and Andromeda clearly state that they won't marry on page 37. There goes our dilemma.
- The Female Issue: As I read this script I couldn't help but notice the way women are portraited: Andromeda is shown as a promiscious young girl, who only wants to party and seduce handsome men. Her mother Queen Cassiopeia is the one getting drunk and provoking Tiamat, thus starting the whole ordeal. The Wilting Girl is so helpless, shy and pale, that she does not deserve a name, until a man gives her one. Medusa, of course, the villain they have to defeat turned into the monster she is, after she was disgraced by a man. But not the man turned into a monster, no, the young girl gets punished by the gods and has to hide in her palace far away from every other human being. I can not find words to describe my anger of such things!

4. Conclusion
The story is, on the surface, your typical Hero's Journey, but all the details are wrong! The characters do and say stupid things most of the time; their motivations are foggy and the end is unsatisfaying: All in all not a great basis to make a big Blockbuster.
But this was not the final shooting script, many changes were made before going into production. So, in the movie all the gods were strictly out of the greek mythology (the Villain is then Hades not Tiamat); Perseus family gets killed, which sends Perseus on his quest and so on. 

5. Questions

-  I plan on reviewing certain aspects of these scripts to find out how they work. Are you interested in reading something like this? 

- I still struggle with the ideal length of my posts. Do I write too much? Not enough? Should I structure my posts in some other way?

Other parts in this series:
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 1
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 2

Your feedback is heartly appreciated!

References: IMDb; Wiki; Roger Ebert; Rotten Tomatoes (28%);

'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 2

by Tristan Mahlow

Post based upon the script dated January 25, 2007 'First Draft' by Travis Beachem

For the sophomore entry in this series, I take a look at a different version of the Clash of the Titans script written nearly four years after the first. The script was written by Travis Beachem. He takes the basic premise, but turns a few things upside down. Let's begin, shall we?

1. Script Summary
2. Script Differences & Similarities
3. Analysis
4. Conclusion
5. Questions

1. Script Summary
We learn that the Gods started a war against humanity to punish them for not believing in the Gods anymore. But Zeus wants to end this war and thus begets a child with Queen Danae. Her husband does not show much understanding for this betrayal and casts her out onto the open sea. She dies, but her demigod son is rescued by fishermen. Years later, the war still raging, the Gods assemble in the halls of Olympos. They decide to sign a peace treaty with the humans to finally end this war. But Tiamat the Deep and Set the Void are against this treaty, as they live off of the fear and blood of the humans. They conspire against the decision of the gods and want to continue this war. Down on earth a messenger of the Gods delivers the conditions of the peace treaty to King Kepheus, ruler of Joppa: His daughter, Andromeda, is to marry a demigod to seal the bond between the Gods and humans. We get to know Andromeda, when her mother Cassiopeia overhears her having sex with someone from the kitchen staff. On an remote island, Perseus, Zeus son, doesn't know about his ancestry or his future when The Wilting Girl knocks on his door and abducts him to Joppa. On arriving at Joppa Perseus is ordered to find Andromeda, who is out partying. He finds her, drunk and dancing. After exchanging pleasantries, Andromeda confesses that she doesn't want to marry him. But nonetheless they then decide to sleep together.

The next day: The festivities for the marriage are starting, Andromeda is making a sour face, while Perseus is just standing around. At the height of the fest, a tipsy Queen Cassiopeia dares to say that her daughter is more beautiful than Tiamat - then, as any revengeful god would do - Tiamat appears, nearly kills Cassiopeia and punishes the people of Joppa for this incident: For the next 30 days The Leviathan will besiege the city and on the last day, the city will be wiped out - unless Joppa sacrificies Andromeda (thus voiding the treaty with the gods). Kepheus is willing to sacrifice his daughter so save the city, but Perseus stops him: He wants to kill The Leviathan! A group (Praetorians, Monster Hunters, The Wilting Girl, Ammon, Cheops) is quickly assembled to travel to the Norm Sisters. Tiamat orders Set to interfere with our hero and his group. Back in Joppa, Andromeda is fed up with just sitting around and waiting, so she flees. Peshet, her maid, goes after her and learns, that there is an underground movement led by Fantasos to capture Andromeda and offer her to Tiamat. On a whim, Peshet becomes a follower. We learn that The Wilting Girl has to die, while our group fights their way through hordes of enemies (a Humbaba, Lotophagi). They are saved by Djinn Riders, which bring them to the Norm Sisters. These sage creatures tell Perseus the only way to stop The Leviathan is with the head of the Medusa. To fight against her, he also receives a shield. So the group continues to the Tartaros Temple, Perseus goes in blindfolded and kills the Medusa. The rest of the group is slaughtered by centaurs. Returning to Joppa, Perseus and The Wilting Girl fall in love and sleep together. Back at Joppa, everbody is getting ready for the big showdown: Andromeda pouts about being  useless, while The Leviathan kills most of the city's inhabitants. It is revealed that Tiamat ultimately wants to ascend the throne of the Gods. The group - now only consisting of Perseus and The Wilting Girl - arrive at Joppa on the last day, stopped by an army laying siege. The Wilting Girl vanishes without a word. Peshet tries to abduct Andromeda, but finds Andromeda trying to kill herself. In another change of character, Peshet now dies defending Andromeda from her abducters, but in vain. The princess is brought to Fantasos, who wants to sacrifice her to Tiamat. When The Leviathan appears, the army starts an attack on Joppa and is met by their mechanical forces. Perseus summons a Pegasus, flies into the city, saves Andromeda and kills The Leviathan. After the battle, Zeus appears and wants Perseus to marry Andromeda. But he refuses as he loves The Wilting Girl. THE END?!

 
2. Script Differences & Similarities
The basic premise of the script stayed the same: >Perseus has to get the head of the Medusa to save a city<. But so many details, so many things have changed that this is a whole different story. Andromeda was reduced from the tough girl to a wailing, party-hopping, promiscuous princess and this time around she stayed in Joppa. And last but not least: Perseus and Andromeda don't fall in love with each other. The enemy this time is a godess herself, not just a fallen son of a god. 
The only new character is the Wilting Girl: a low godess, helping Zeus. She dies, because nobody prays to her anymore, but nonetheless she and Perseus fall in love with each other.
The Leviathan plays a bigger role in this new script, as it was just a last resort in the previous script.

3. Analysis
To get a clearer picture of the script, I want to take a look at the motivations for our characters:

Perseus: Longing for an important and meaningful life; discovering to be the son of Zeus takes care of that on page 19; what is his motivation for the rest of the movie? He kills the Medusa because he is supposed to do that; at the End of the movie: wants to save the Wilting Girl;
The Wilting Girl: No real intrinsic motivations, she is a servant of Zeus and as such follows his orders;

Andromeda: Really doesn't want to marry; that's about it.
Tiamat: Wants to ascend the throne of the Gods; this is good and believable motivation for our villain;

The Djinn Riders: Another addition to the script, they appear deus ex machina, save the day, and disappear again;

So, after thinking about the motivations, it becomes clear: What is the dilemma? Why should Perseus care, if Joppa is destroyed? In the previous script Perseus cared, just because he cared for Andromeda and that alone is a good motivation to prevent her sacrifice. But in this version, Perseus loves the Wilting Girl. But then why didn't he do everything in his power to save her, instead of saving Joppa (a city he just visited for the first time)? Only after the Leviathan is killed, he starts to think about his love - and walks away from his responsibility to Joppa. Why didn't he do this to begin with? The script cuts back and forth between Joppa and our group, but the Joppa segments don't provide any counterpart to the group segments: On one hand because nothing is really happening in Joppa, and on the other hand the reader doesn't care about Andromeda. So, all in all: the characters took a turn for the worse.
The Villain: Tiamat and Set are the antagonists this time: They want the power of Zeus and prevent the signing of the peace treaty. This is a strong motive (stronger than Calabus' motivation). But in the end they are not defeated! Perseus kills Tiamat's pet, but there is no confrontation between her and Perseus. So, after killing The Leviathan, there are no consequences: After all Perseus doesn't marry Andromeda, will the war continue? Tiamat is still around, she doesn't just stop going after the throne of Zeus, does she?

What didn't work:
- The Motivation: the characters (except the villains) have no real motivations to do any of those things they do in the script, resulting in less suspense.
- Change In Character: Peshet is introduced as the most loyal servant to Andromeda, 50 pages later she wants to kill Andromeda, another 50 pages later she dies saving her; Perseus sleeps with Andromeda, falls in love with the Wilting Girl; - This is not only a problem of motivation for every character; but of their characterisation in general. They do seem all over the place, doing whatever creates a good scene and not doing what fits to one character.
- Unfinished Business: Perseus doesn't defeat Tiamat; this feels unfinished, unsatisfaying. Additionally the script (as the previous one) doesn't find an answer to all those underlying questions about the power of mankind.

What worked:
- The Villains: Tiamat is a interesting character; her threath seems more palpable.
- And Action: the set pieces were interesting, diverse and well-written.


4. Conclusion
The script tries so hard to be different, to be new and original - but it changes everything for the worse. All core ingredients are there again, but twisted and distorted, so they never convey a real sense of story and character. The characters seem to be real problem of this script: they never come alive, they never relate to the reader.

5. Questions
The script hints at "The Iron Horde", which was lost in the war, quite often throughout, but they never play any role whatsoever. Is this planting for a proposed sequel?
After reading my post: What would you have kept from this version of the script?
What changes would you make on this script?

Other parts in this Series:
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 1
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 3




Your feedback is heartly appreciated!


References: IMDb; Wiki; Roger Ebert; Rotten Tomatoes;

'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt.1

by Tristan Mahlow

Post based upon the Script dated March 06, 2003 'First Draft' by John Glenn & Travis Wright

'Clash of the Titans' is not a bad movie. But is not a good movie either. It is a mediocre movie with the potential for greatness. In the following weeks I want to analyse the movie from different perspectives, looking for clues why and where this potential got lost.
In this series of articles I want to chart the evolution of the 'Clash of the Titans' scripts with its many revisions up to the finished film. I will present the differences between the scripts and the movie, what I think about the changes made and if they - in my opinion - could have improved the movie.


1. Script Summary
2. Analysis
3. Conclusion
4. Questions


1. Script Summary
Calabus, the fallen and disgraced son of Hera, is out for the destruction of the world. Only the city of Phoenicia stands in his way anymore. In the gruesome siege we get to know Perseus, a conscript, just trying to survive in this madness. As Fate goes, he is send on a mission by Queen Cassiopeia to bring a parchment to the Sisters of Fate. He gathers his best friends (Nico & Ammon), thinking this is the best way to desert the doomed city. But the group is joined by Princess Andromeda and she guilts them into actually delivering the parchment. Upon arriving at the Sisters of Fate, Perseus learns that he is the only one who can stop Calabus and his army. To defeat him he needs the head of Medusa. Unbekownst to the group they are overheard by Calabus and he decides to follow them. This starts the dangerous journey of our heroic group, they cross a desert and have to survive an oasis filled with monsters (Nico gets killed and revived). They reach the Forest of Darkness, fighting against all kinds of mythological creatures, all while Andromeda and Perseus admit their love for each other. Ammon dies a heroic death, but Perseus now believes in the gods. He flies over the river Styx, kills Medusa and returns, only to find his group ambushed by Calabus. The Pegasus sacrificies himself to save Perseus, but nonetheless Andromeda and the head of Medusa fall into the hands of Calabus. Perseus is poisened and nearly dies, when - all of the sudden - Ammon returns! It turns out he was Apollo all along, protecting Perseus in the name of his father, Zeus. Back at Phoenicia Calabos orders the city to be burned down, only to be stopped by Perseus. Fighting commences! With the help of the returned Pegasus and the head of Medusa, he won back, Perseus can turn Calabus' army into stone. In a desperate attempt to win, Calabus kills Andromeda. Blind of rage, Perseus kills Calabus. His mother Hera is not amused and cracks open the earth, to release The Kraken. Perseus uses his demi-god powers and throws a bolt of lightning and kills the beast. The dust settles, the battle is won and Zeus appears, resurrecting Andromeda. We end with Perseus reigning as king of a prosperous Phoenicia and his queen Andromeda bearing their first child.

2. Analysis
What worked:
- Constant threat: Calabus is not a deep character, but a good villain. His motivation isn't really fleshed out, but he just needs to drive the action forward. By deafeating him, Perseus achieves a real goal. 

- Change in motivation: At first Perseus just wants to flee the city, in order to save his own live. He is pressured into delivering the parchment, But when he learns of his destiny, he willingly accepts it and grows to be the hero. Which leads me to:
- Change in character: Perseus goes from the selfish, non-believer to the heroic son of Zeus. His change is enough to be interesting.
- The Love Aspect: It is pretty straightforward: the hero and the only girl get together and fall in love. No disctractions, nothing surprising.

What didn't work:
- Everbody lives: Although it is nice that everybody gets their Happy Ever After, it feels strange that every death (except Calabus') is reversed throughout the script. It would feel more dangerous, if some deaths were permanent.
- The whole conflict between Hera and Zeus is never really explained.
- The question wether man should be a pawn for the gods (asked on page 2 of the script) is never really answered; I think the script doesn't care.

3. Conclusion
The First Draft of 'Clash of the Titans' is a simple, well-constructed Hero's Journey. All the ingredients are there: the reluctant hero, the beautiful princess, the dark villain, the sidekicks and the goal to save the world. The characters are a little to cookie-cutter most of the time, the dialogues are not shakespearian, but this is a Blockbuster-Action-Film-Script. And as such it delivers. There are action sequences throughout the whole film, culminating in a big satisfying showdown involving Calabus, his army and the Kraken.

4. Questions
- Is the story to well-known, to unoriginal to be interesting?
- What would you have changed? And what kept?
- Would you have rather have seen this movie in cinemas this year?

Other parts in this Series:
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 2
'Clash of the Titans' (2010) - Evolution of a Script Pt. 3

Your feedback is heartly appreciated!

References: IMDb; Wiki; Roger Ebert; Rotten Tomatoes (28%);